Feeling Stuck?

FEELING STUCK?

Then ask yourself "What's my glue?"

What keeps you stuck - your job, your relationships, your mortgage, your self?

Are your thoughts, feeling, attitudes and behaviours keeping you stuck?

Are you unsure, unmotivated or uninspired?

Is fear your glue, has fear got you frozen in place?

Spend a moment pondering this today because if we don't know what is keeping us stuck we'll never know how to become unstuck!

‪#‎stuck‬ ‪#‎fear‬ ‪#‎unsure‬ ‪#‎unmotivated‬ ‪#‎uninspired‬ ‪#‎reclaim‬ ‪#‎wellness‬ ‪#‎kinesiology‬

Are you Indecisive? Yes, No, Maybe, Sometimes...

Are you indecisive?
I guess if you are you would have difficulty answering that question.
But seriously even if we don't label ourselves as indecisive in general, there are time in our lives when we all struggle to make decisions - big or small, important or insignificant.

We can decide on the spur of the moment to make a major change in our life but we can also spend over an hour trying to decide what to wear. There can be periods in our life when every decision comes easily or where every choice is painstakingly overthought and difficult. Or you may be someone who makes important, snap decisions all day at work but when it comes to your personal life you second guess everything.

What's going on with us during those times of indecision? What changes?

Factors that influence the decision making process include -
                 * predicted outcomes / benefits
                 * impact on self and others
                 * confidence
                 * possiblities / resources

We usually make choices that we believe will benefit ourselves and/or others, that we feel confident in doing and that are possible to achieve with the resources we have available to us.

So when we are struggling to make a decision there is uncertainty in at least one of these areas, and this uncertainty stems from fear.
Fear of  - making the wrong choice
               - hurting ourselves or others
               - not having enough (time, money, knowledge etc)
               - embarrassment / judgement
               - rejection
Fear that we may not benefit from the outcome of our decisions.

How to overcome the fear...
Try to ease the pressure on yourself when you're feeling indecisive by reminding yourself that no decision guarantees an outcome. If the decision you make does not create the result you desired decide to try something new.

Don't be too attached to any decision, instead make the choice that feels right for you and let that play out, go with the flow and decide how you choose to react to whatever arises (this is truly all you have control over anyway).

And remember if it feels too hard to make a decision so you end up do nothing instead - deciding to do nothing is still a decision that you've made.

Free Yourself From Judgement

WHAT IS JUDGEMENT?

Judgement is getting overcome by our thoughts and reactions to a person, place, situation or even ourselves. It is often associated with feelings of anger or frustration as it is usually a reaction to something we are opposed to or offended by. We may hear ourselves saying “should” or “should not” or making huge generalisations like “all ........ are ........”. Judgement points the finger of blame and assumes you know the outcome of events. Self judgement involves criticism, “I am” statements and feelings of guilt, remorse or regret.

Judgement closes us off from hearing other points of view and from looking at things from a different perspective. It severs connection to our heart and our inner self.

LETTING GO OF JUDGEMENT

Not judging ourselves, people, things or situations does not mean having no opinion, no discernment or no emotional response. Letting go of judgements means getting out of our head and away from our learned reactions. To stop judging everything as right or wrong and stepping back to consider the bigger picture. No longer only seeing black and white but allowing ourselves to view the whole rainbow.

CONSIDER THIS...

A person is stuck in traffic and will probably be late for a 9am meeting. There are 2 ways this situation could be approached:

1.       Judgemental Reaction

“This #@%! traffic should be going faster, I’m going to be late for my meeting. There’s obviously a lot of women drivers on the road – they’re all totally useless and shouldn’t be allowed out during peak hour. I’m so stupid I should have left earlier.”

This reaction  - allocates blame “women drivers”

                      - generalises “they’re all totally useless”

                                  - includes shoulds and should nots “should be going faster” 
                                                                                      “shouldn’t be allowed out”
                                  - predicts outcome “I’m going to be late”
                                  - judges self “I’m so stupid”

Think of the physical and emotional reaction the person with these beliefs is having to the situation and how they are likely to arrive at the meeting.

2.       Non-judgemental Response

“The traffics really slow this morning, I’m worried I’ll be late for the meeting. I think I’ll pull over at the next street to call work and let them know.”

This reaction - has opinion “traffics really slow”

                    - feels emotion “worried about being late”

                    - uses discernment “I think I’ll pull over and call work”

How may this person arrive at the meeting?

Now these 2 situations are the same with the same probable outcome ie. arriving late for the meeting. However, one is experienced with judgement and one without.

Which experience would you choose?

Which do you choose?

ONE LAST NOTE

Having judgement can make us think we have power and control over a situation – we have pointed the finger of blame (at self and others) and we have decided the way things should or should not be, but using the previous example we can see that by doing this we have actually lost control, we have handed it over and become a victim of the situation.

So next time you notice yourself reacting with judgement – hear negative self talk, generalisations or place blame, ask yourself

“Who said?”                       “Is what I’m saying here actually true?”

“How could I view this differently?”             “Is this really how I want to react, feel and be?”

Answer with your heart, your deep inner truth, not your head. Reword any negative self talk instantly and notice the physical and emotional changes you have just created for yourself –

Breathe, free yourself from judgement and see the rainbow.

Wishing you health, harmony and happiness

Kylie and Leanne

Hooray for Spring

Spring is here and this month is a perfect time to start planning and actioning all those wonderful projects and changes you had running through your head during winter.

Use the energy of new life surrounding you to give birth to your ideas, hopes and dreams and start the process of creating the new life for yourself that you've imagined.

But remember don't get too stuck on any one plan or idea, be flexible and go with the flow. Instead of being totally focused on the end result why not enjoy the process along the way. To help you achieve this enjoyment try letting go of judgement of self, of others, of situation and of outcomes. Get out in nature whenever you can and notice how it to has a plan for growth and renewal but also see how adaptable it is. 

For this season of new beginnings, development and growth strive to be like a growing seedling - plant some sturdy roots down into the earth, grow tall and strong and branch out. Don't get angry at the sun if it's not shining as brightly as you want  or annoyed at the rain for not falling, don't get frustrated at yourself if you're not growing as quickly as you think you should or judge yourself for not providing the shade you had hoped for. Instead sway with the breeze, enjoy and appreciate each moment.

Yours in health, harmony & happiness
Kylie & Leanne

FEAR!

This month's blog is all about fear!

What are your fears and where do they come from?

Have you ever wondered why different people fear different things or why the presence of a harmless spider can bring a grown man to run in the opposite direction while a child can happily handle that same spider?

There are 2 types of fears:

1. Those we are born with - falling and loud noises
            and
2. Those we learn along the way - everything else

So it stands to reason that if we learnt almost all our fears then surely we can unlearn them. 

There are as many different ways to overcome fears as there are fears themselves, however, all start with the same thing - acknowledgement of the fear and a desire to change it.

Sounds simple but many things may get in the way like thoughts that our fears keep us safe or that fearless = reckless. Fears can also be an excuse to not try new things and keep us in our comfort zone.

Next time you're letting fear hold you back ask yourself -

"Where does this fear come from?"
"How do I believe it keeps me safe?"
"Is what I believe about this fear true or is it False Evidence Appearing Real?"

then trust in your wisdom, knowledge and the understanding of consequence to keep you safe. 

And remember as Franklin D Roosevelt said 
"the only thing to fear is fear itself".

In health, harmony & happiness
Reclaim Wellness
KINESIOLOGY for Mind, Body & Spirit
Phone: 0412 335 720
http://www.reclaimwellness.com.au
 www.facebook.com/2reclaimwellness

The Gifts of Winter

Wow it's already half way through 2015 and winter is now upon us. With this change of season we enter into the water phase of Chinese 5 Element Theory. The cold and dark properties of water are also prevalent in winter enticing us to hibernate, rest and recuperate, to move away from the cold world outside, to go inside and dive deep into ourselves - a time for inner reflection - to ponder our inner knowledge, our hopes and our feelings. So why not take this gift of winter to reflect upon yourself and your life. In particular pay attention to any areas where you withdraw, try to control or take risks and ask yourself the who, when and why of these behaviours,for example: Who do I withdraw from? When am I my most controlling? Why do I engage in risk taking behaviours? Be gentle on yourself and try to find that calm stillness that rests at the bottom of every ocean and in the depths of us all. In health, harmony and happiness Kylie and Leanne If you'd like to take this self reflection further please join us for our June Workshop - "Addressing Behaviour: Control, Withdrawal and Risk". WHEN: Monday 22nd June TIME:  6 - 8pm             COST:  $20 pp                  For more information and to book your seat please follow this link:https://www.facebook.com/events/481267395366408/ Copyright © 2015 Reclaim Wellness, All rights reserved.

Your core self.

Tell me a bit about yourself?

Do you usually answer this question with your job title, marital status, particulars about your family, where you live or your hobbies?

Are these things really you?

What if you had none of these things, what would your answer be? 

If you had no job, no partner, no family, no fixed address and no hobbies - who would you be?

We all surround ourselves with people, objects, places and situations that we think give us joy, purpose and contentment but do these things really define who we are?

So who are you really?

Using an explanation Kit Campbell gave on Extreme Health Radio, consider the statement "I think with my mind."

If you break this statement down "think" is a verb, something you're doing, "my" is a preposition that shows ownership and what you are thinking with, and "mind" is a noun, an object, a name of something.

So what is the "I"? What is this "I" that we begin many sentences with, the "I" that witnesses the thinking mind? Who is the "I" behind your thoughts, your feelings and your actions?

Is this"I" the real you?

Grief...Guilt...and...Value

What is the relationship between grief, guilt and value?

So if you're feeling grief or guilt think about what value has been lost and try to come up with new ways to bring that value back in to your life.

More thoughts on value...

#value #love #spirit #worth

Lost your focus?

Here are 3 quick questions, how long you spend on the answers is up to you...
 

What do you value most in your life?

What do you value about yourself?

Does the way you live reflect the answer you just gave?

I hope you take the time to give this some honest and deep thought because...


If you need assistance to reconnect with your true value we can help with kinesiology balances, online consultations, monthly workshops (in clinic or online) and wellness products. Please contact us on 0412 335 720 or email admin@reclaimwellness.com.au or to find out more about us check out our website www.reclaimwellness.com.au

Wishing you health, harmony and happiness
xo

#value #worth #spirit #trueself #love #truth

How do I let go? What do I do now?

HOW DO I LET GO?

To be truly able to let go we need first to have an understanding why we're holding on in the first place.

This may sound harsh but if you say there's something you want to let go of but can't, there's a reason why you're choosing not to. Sometimes it may not feel like it but it really is YOU choosing the emotion, behaviour and thoughts that you experience.

So to truly let something go you need to ask yourself:  

 

What does holding on to this situation, feeling, memory, or relationship give you? 

There's a reason why you're choosing not to let go.

Be totally honest with yourself and identify the need you're feeding.

For example:

If you say “I want to let go of anxiety” maybe you choose to feel anxious because it makes you feel like you have some control – that if you worry and think things through you’ll be ready for any potential outcome. You may also believe that if you worry about other people it shows you care, or your anxiety may serve you as a reason to avoid certain situations.

WHAT DO I DO NOW?

Now that you've identified some possible reasons as to why you've not been able to let go, you need to consider some healthier, more supportive, more life affirming ways to address those needs. So following on from the example above:

Instead of using anxiety to feed your need for control maybe you could work on trusting that you have the capacity and strength to handle any situation that comes your way.

Or if your worry shows that you care, instead of upsetting yourself to show care how about just being caring and actually do something positive for another that demonstrates your feelings. Eg. If you're worried about an upcoming event in a loved ones life maybe research ways that could empower them to manage that event, or talk to them about how they're feeling (take the focus away from your worry to their feelings).

If your anxiety gives you a reason to avoid certain situations maybe you could look at why you want to avoid those situations and address that. Maybe you need to learn to say no to things you don't want to do, or you need to work on your fear of certain situations.

There are many ways you can learn to live more harmoniously so be creative - try to bring in physical, behavioural, spiritual, emotional and mental ways to do this.

The following question may help with this:

Do you need to find some meaning or lesson in the experience before you can let it go.If yes what?

Is there anyone you need to forgive to help you move on – this could also include forgiving yourself?

Do you need to make amends with someone to settle an issue? 

If yes who?

Do you need to express your feelings to another before you can move on?

If yes who?

Are you holding on to any resentment that is stopping you from letting go?

What judgements do you need to let go of about the way things should be or should have been?

Who can you go to for help - a friend/loved one, professional, support group?

What physical activity could help eg. yoga, a team sport, join a gym, dance class, art class?

Is there a spiritual/personal practice that may assist you eg. church,meditation, journaling?

Copyright © 2015 Reclaim Wellness, All rights reserved.                 #letting go #wellness #health #peace #grief #what now

      

 

 

What do you need to let go of and why?

What is it you want to let go of?

This could be a situation, a feeling, a relationship, a behaviour, a lifestyle or even an idea you no longer believe in.

What in your life no longer supports your best self?

Think about what is holding you back from living your best life.

What is affecting you physically, emotionally, mentally or spiritually?

Keep in mind that letting go is not forgetting or ignoring who you are or what you’ve been through it is accepting, forgiving and releasing anything that is blocking your life path, happiness and freedom.

It’s not about cutting yourself off from your past or acting like it never happened, real letting go is being able to look back with gratitude, peace and love. Facing your current reality and learning how to move on from here. If we can find the value in what has passed and what is to come, then we can flow more freely with the ups and downs of life.

When we realise that holding on does not change the past or control the future we can see that letting go frees us from our judgements, grief, guilt or expectations and puts us in touch with the present moment and our true self.

It is also important for us to be able to let go for our physical, emotional and mental wellbeing.

Copyright © 2015 Reclaim Wellness, All rights reserved.

#letting go #blog #health #moving on

Letting Go

The autumn months are related to the Metal element in Chinese 5 Element Theory.

The metal element is all about letting go, it's about deciding what we value and discarding anything that's no longer in our best interest. This is evident in the organs related to the metal element, the lungs and large intestines, both of which take things into the body keeping what is valuable and useful and discarding what is not needed.

It's a time to rid ourselves of anything unnecessary (emotions, objects, memories, thoughts, behaviours) and to shine up what we now value to it's highest expression.

If you think in nature's terms it's the time of year when a tree draws back nutrients from it's leaves and allows them to fall. It may look cold and harsh from the outside but a lot of self care and inner reflection is going on. The tree is preparing itself to survive the winter so it can bloom and thrive again in the spring.

Or as another example in the construction of a building metal time is when the project is complete and the remaining material and rubbish are cleared away - this clearing away allows for the true nature of the building to be seen*.

The same goes for us if we do not clear away that which is no longer needed our metal will remain dulled or tarnished and our true nature, our true self can not shine.
 

So the beginning of Autumn is the ideal time to ask yourself:
 

Is there anything I need to let go of?

What in my life is tarnishing me?

What is keeping me from looking inside, connecting to my true self and letting that true self shine?

We will be addressing these questions more over the coming weeks on this blog along with covering things like What do I need to let go of and why? How do I let go? and What do I do now?

Or if you'd like to work on this more directly please come to our  
March Workshop  "Letting Go"
Thursday 19 March 6 - 8pm.
 

For more info and to book please go to https://www.eventbrite.com.au/e/march-kinesiolgy-mind-body-medicine-workshop-letting-go-tickets-15971541310

Yours in health, harmony and happiness
Kylie and Leanne

* The tree and construction examples come from Gail Reichstein's book "wood becomes water - Chinese Medicine in Everyday Life"

Copyright © 2015 Reclaim Wellness, All rights reserved.

Chinese 5 Element Theory

Chinese 5 element theory explains the cycle of nature and the cycle of life. The five elements of wood, fire, earth, metal and water can be used to explain our path, our behaviour, our innate nature, our goals and our wellbeing. When we get stuck on one element or one aspect of our life we create dis-harmony, dis-satisfaction and dis-ease. Having an understanding of the 5 elements, their patterns and lessons, helps us to move comfortably through life with an understanding that all things must end - just as surely as they will begin again. If you would like to learn more about the Chinese 5 Elements please come along to our Wednesday Evening Weekly Workshops DATES: 11, 18 and 25 February TIME: 7 - 8:30pm COST: $20 for all 3 workshops To enrol please follow this link https://www.facebook.com/events/402144576577351/ and click on "going" Learn a new way of understanding life, yourself and your loved ones. In health, harmony and happiness Reclaim Wellness www.reclaimwellness.com.au www.facebook.com/2reclaimwellness